Why does a 2-year-old child sleep poorly at night: causes and treatment

Very often, young parents are interested in why their child (2 years old) sleeps poorly at night. When will he learn to rest from evening to morning? Even today, there are parents who blame the problem on the evil eye or some mysterious forces, resorting to conspiracies and other tricks to make their child sleep through the night without interruption. But what actually prevents the little man from resting peacefully all night?

Most often, by the end of the first year of life, the child can already sleep without interruption throughout the night. But there are children who need more time to master this skill. According to statistics, out of five children, at least one child 1-2 years old does not sleep well at night. This behavior may also be a manifestation of the child’s character. Active, restless children are able to wake up from any extraneous sounds, but it can be very difficult for them to fall back to sleep. And such children need much less time to rest, so they wake up very early.

Of course, nights spent trying to put a crying or laughing child to bed do not pass without leaving an impact on the family as a whole. Parents feel tired and, as a result, irritated. The child, the partner, and household or work matters are annoying. That is why it is necessary to start teaching your child to sleep through the night as early as possible. However, after a fight they do not wave their fists, and if a child (2 years old) does not sleep well at night, it is important to urgently find out why and decide what to do about it.

Sleep phases

Sleep is one of the most important physiological needs of humans. During sleep, many processes occur in the human body that ensure the normal functioning of all vital organs, namely:

Sleep has two main phases - slow and fast, each of which performs an important function for a person. During the slow phase, the body is renewed, lost energy is replenished, and thought processes are regulated. This phase has several stages:

• Falling into slumber. The brain continues to work, the information received is processed. Many adults in a state of drowsiness can solve issues that puzzled them the day before.
• Falling asleep. Consciousness turns off and on again, but the brain continues to work. In the intervals between switching on and off, a person can hear everything that happens around him. The muscles come to a relaxed state, the pulse slows down. Children may be awakened by the slightest sound while falling asleep.
• Transitional deep stage. The brain gradually switches off, the body completely relaxes, and processes in the body slow down.
• The deepest sleep. The brain stops responding to the outside world, breathing becomes deep, blood circulation slows down. It is very difficult to wake a person at this time. Even if the sleeper wakes up, he will not immediately understand where he is and what is happening to him.

After the slow phase comes the fast one. During this time, a person may have vivid dreams. If a child is woken up during the rapid phase, he will be able to describe the dream in vivid colors. During the fast phase, the following processes occur:

• brain development;
• memory training;
• elimination of nervous tension;
• assimilation of new information;
• brain rewiring.

The four stages of slow-wave sleep and REM sleep make up one cycle. A person can undergo from 4 to 6 cycles during the night. The duration of each of them depends on age. In newborns, REM sleep predominates over slow wave sleep. They are able to enter the fast phase immediately after falling asleep. In adults, slow-wave sleep makes up the bulk of a night's rest.

The duration of cycles in children depending on age and the ratio of sleep phases are shown in the table:

Person's age	Cycle duration, min.	Ratio of REM sleep to NREM sleep, %	Need for sleep, hours per day
0 – 1 month	40	75	16 — 20
1 – 3 months	45	45 — 50	14 — 16
3 – 5 months	45 — 50	37 — 40	12 — 15
6 months - 1 year	45 — 50	35 — 40	11 — 14
15 years	50	25	10 — 13
5 – 10 years	60	25	9 — 11
Over 10 years old	90 — 100	20 — 25	8 — 10

Bad sleep after a year

A one-year-old baby sleeps restlessly at night for almost the same reasons as before: an unbalanced diet, lack of calcium, teething. But the duration of sleep is significantly reduced.

Every year, children switch to one day of rest. If the baby begins to go to bed later in the evening, constantly wakes up and “spins” in the crib, and gets up in the morning at the usual time, then it’s time to eliminate the second day’s rest.

You can learn how to do this from the article “How much do one-year-old children sleep, and when is it time to sound the alarm.”

Another turning point at this age is weaning off nightly “meals.” From a physiological point of view, Komarovsky recalls, an infant is ready to give up snacks at night as early as 6 months. However, most mothers resolve this issue at 1-1.5 years, receiving another reason for nighttime whims.

In this case, a well-known pediatrician advises feeding the baby high-calorie milk and cereal porridge before bedtime, so that the child remains full longer, and offering only water at night.

Physiological reasons

There are many reasons why a child does not sleep well between 2 and 3 years of age.
But the mother can easily figure out most of them on her own. Sometimes parental mistakes lead to sleep problems, or external irritants prevent the child from resting normally. All reasons that disrupt normal night sleep can be divided into physiological and psychological. Physiological reasons include:

Uncomfortable bed. A mattress that is too soft, down pillows and blankets, a crib that is too large or small – every little thing matters for a baby. The child’s mattress should be elastic enough so that it does not sag too much under body pressure. The pillow size is no more than 40x60 with high-quality hypoallergenic filling. The blanket should be warm but light. Bedding is made only from natural fabrics. Uncomfortable clothes. The baby's pajamas should not restrict his movement. No more than 10% of synthetic additives in children's clothing is allowed. Do not wrap your child up - if he is hot, he will not be able to sleep peacefully. It is better to cover it with a warmer blanket if the room is cool. Bows, large buttons and other voluminous and solid decorative elements - for daytime wear. Also pay attention to the neck - nothing should rub or squeeze the child’s neck while sleeping. External stimuli. Bright light, loud noise, strong odors - all this interferes with normal sleep. You should not teach your child to sleep only in complete silence. Pets can quietly go about their business, but should avoid loud conversations or sounds that could frighten the baby. Proper evening lighting is provided by a small night light, which can be left burning until the morning if the child is afraid of the dark. Air temperature and humidity. The optimal air temperature in a children's bedroom is 18-20°C. With it, a baby in cotton pajamas will not freeze, even if he opens up at night. Air humidity – 50-70%. Before putting your child to bed, the room must be well ventilated. This will provide additional oxygen flow and speed up sleep. Physical fatigue. The sudden changes in mood of a 2-year-old child during active games are due to the fact that he cannot yet control his own overwork. Adults should supervise this. A very tired baby suddenly begins to be capricious, cry, and protest for any reason. The processes of inhibition in his psyche are much slower than excitation. Therefore, he no longer has any physical strength left, and his psyche is hyperactive. He wants to keep playing and moving, but he can't

It is very important to correctly alternate active games with quiet activities during the day. And definitely no hyperactivity 2 hours before bedtime!

Hunger or overeating

Dinner should be light and end no later than 19.30-20.00. At night, you can give your child a little warm milk (100-150 ml). And by the age of 2 years, night feedings should be a thing of the past! At night, the digestive system should rest. But eating dinner too early can cause a child to have trouble falling asleep. If he ate at 18.00-18.30, and goes to bed at 21.00-21.30, he may have time to get hungry. Drinking milk at night will satisfy your hunger and provide the body with additional calcium, which directly affects the quality of sleep. Illness or pain. Fortunately for the mother, at two years old the child can already tell and even show what hurts or what bothers him. But he is not yet big enough to do it on his own, and not in response to a question. Therefore, if you notice that your child has begun to sleep poorly, behaves unusually, and often wakes up at night crying, ask where it hurts. The onset of a serious illness is usually always visible to the baby: he becomes lethargic, capricious, his body temperature changes, and his appetite disappears. In this case, it is better to consult a pediatrician.

Identifying and eliminating physiological factors that affect sleep quality is quite simple. But from 1.5-2 years, they are usually not the main problem. At this age, most often the baby’s nighttime and daytime sleep is influenced by psychological reasons, which can sometimes be very difficult to cope with.

Nutrition

This may seem strange to some, but if a child (2 years old) does not sleep well at night, poor nutrition may be to blame. From a biological point of view, night feedings are no longer necessary from 6 months. Therefore, if a child (2 years old) sleeps poorly at night and demands food, this does not mean that he is really hungry. Most likely, he does this simply out of habit, or he wants to communicate. The more actively parents satisfy these requirements, the more firmly this model of behavior settles in the child’s brain. It is better to avoid feeding at night. Firstly, the habit of eating at night has done no good to anyone, and secondly, a full stomach can become the next cause of sleep disturbances.

At the first dinner (the penultimate meal), it is better to slightly underfeed the baby in order to fill his stomach at the end of the day. Still, this must be done without fanaticism - the last meal should be at least 2 hours before bedtime. It is best to have dinner with fruit, porridge, a small amount of meat and dairy products. Sweets eaten in the evening will make the child more active and interfere with healthy sleep.

Folk remedies

Since ancient times, our grandmothers have used the forces of nature to calm children. Some recipes have survived to this day.

Traditional healers also advise bathing children before bed in decoctions of various herbs. Both soothing teas and a decoction of thyme, calendula, lavender, oregano, and linden are perfect for this. A large number of such herbs can now be found in almost every pharmacy, already in packaged form. But before using any herbs, you need to be sure that your baby does not have allergic reactions to them.

Similar decoctions can be taken orally, 1/3 cup before bedtime.

Another proven folk remedy that can calm the baby is a few fresh acorns or chestnuts. Previously, it was believed that the energy of plant embryos at a subtle psychological level harmonizes the biofield, acting soothingly. It is difficult to say how effective this method is. But it's still worth a try.

Wrong lifestyle

As modern medical research shows, up to 60 percent of children suffer from sleep disorders due to the wrong lifestyle created for them by their parents. We are talking about proper adherence to circadian rhythms, as well as energy expenditure and consumption.

Rare going out for walks, eating plenty of food, irregular night rest with falling asleep later than 22 pm - all these factors negatively affect sleep. In addition, it is worth considering that some children are so mobile and active that they exhaust their accumulated energy only during a many-hour “marathon” on the street with running, jumping and outdoor games.

How to solve such a problem?

• Create a standardized daily routine. You need to get up and go to bed at the same time, it is advisable to go to bed no later than 21 pm. Daytime rest should also be strictly regulated;
• Walks and more walks. Walk with your child as often as possible, fresh air and active movement will help your child throw out accumulated energy and sleep much better;

• Additional sections. An addition (but not an alternative) for your child can be specialized sections for sports exercises, dancing, swimming, etc.;
• Significant limitation of watching TV and computer. You exchange the imaginary calm of your baby while sitting at the computer or watching cartoons on TV for a good night's sleep.

Komarovsky's sleep rules

More than one generation of children has grown up on the advice of Dr. Komarovsky. The famous pediatrician has recommendations for any case. If your 2-year-old child has trouble sleeping at night, follow the famous doctor’s rules for a restful night’s rest:

- Don't forget about your needs. The doctor believes that the most important thing for any child is a happy family. Happy also means getting enough sleep. This means that Komarovsky’s first advice concerns parents: be sure to get enough sleep. — A clear daily routine. As mentioned above, for a child’s stable sleep, proper organization of the entire day is necessary. Following a clear schedule gives the child a sense of security and confidence. - Who to sleep with. According to Komarovsky, each family member should have their own place to sleep. He does not consider it beneficial for children to sleep together with their parents. - There is no need for anything extra. If a child sleeps too long during the day, he needs to be woken up so that he can rest all the time he needs at night. — Optimize feeding. Do not overfeed the child, do not allow snacks. Feeding should occur at the same time, the evening meal should be nutritious, but not heavy. The situation when a 2-year-old child sleeps poorly at night and cries, very often arises precisely against the background of overeating. — Spending the day correctly. Move a lot, play outdoor games, read books, walk. - Air. The room in which the child sleeps must be ventilated daily. If possible, before going to bed at night, you should do a wet cleaning and purchase an air humidifier. - Bed. The child's mattress should be dry, even, and evenly padded. Children under 2-3 years old do not need pillows at all. Older children can use a thin pillow. Bed linen should only be natural. It should be washed with baby detergents. - Diapers. Diapers must be breathable, moisture-proof, and suitable for the child in size and model.

What to do if you have disturbed sleep?

Most often, the cause of night fears is emotional overload before bedtime and improper sleep schedule. Sometimes the cause of fear is fear. Emotional overload can be caused by the late return of the father, who before bedtime arranges noisy emotional communication with the child. Excited children have difficulty falling asleep and often wake up and call for their mother. Such conditions occur several times a week. Night terrors go away by adolescence.

Noisy games in the evening should be canceled

If the baby wakes up at night from his own scream, take the baby in your arms, calm him down in a quiet voice and ask all household members who have come running to the scream to leave the children's room. If your child has frequent night terrors, you should consult a neurologist. Prolonged night terrors may be of epileptic origin.

When treating sleep disturbance in children 2 years old, it is very important to adhere to the following measures:

• maintain a daily routine;
• do not allow games on the computer or phone before a night's rest;
• It is recommended to put a 2-year-old baby to bed at 21:00 at the same time;
• ensure daytime sleep of 1.5–2 hours;
• Avoid watching TV before going to bed;
• an hour before falling asleep, do not allow noisy active games;
• It is useful to take a walk with your baby before bedtime or dinner;
• Before going to bed, ventilate the room well;
• The baby should not be too hot or cold during the night's rest.

Daytime rest is important for children 2 years old. A baby who does not sleep during the day will not sleep well at night. It is useful to perform a ritual of preparation for falling asleep - collect toys, read a fairy tale. At a younger age, if you have trouble falling asleep or waking up at night, you can give soothing herbal infusions of valerian and lemon balm. It is useful to conduct a course of treatment before going to bed with warm baths with an infusion of a herbal collection consisting of equal parts of thyme, valerian, motherwort, and lemon balm. For infusion, brew 2 tbsp. l. dry mixture with 1 glass of water and leave for a quarter of an hour in a water bath. The water temperature should not be higher than 37.0 °C.

How to help your baby sleep?

Before taking any action, it is important to understand the reason for your baby’s poor sleep. If these are not serious problems requiring medical intervention, your patience and love will help.

It is very important to adhere to the correct regime: waking up the child in the morning to feed him, and putting him to bed during the day at the same time. This will help the child’s body develop harmoniously without succumbing to unnecessary stress.

Read: Dried fruit compote is the healthiest thing for babies

Also think over an evening bedtime ritual so that the baby understands that after some actions he should fall asleep. For example, bathing, feeding, a fairy tale or lullaby, sleep. While bathing, you can add a few drops of lavender, chamomile or other soothing herbs to the bath.

Do not forget about tactile contact with the child: hugs, stroking, kisses. This will help calm your baby and make him feel safe.

Quiet, melodic sleep music will also have a positive effect on your child's sleep process. You can turn on audio recordings of nature sounds. They also have a beneficial effect on calming the nervous system. It would be a good idea to purchase a night light so that your child does not develop a fear of the dark.

Do not overstimulate your baby in the evening. Loud sounds, noisy music, and too active games are prohibited. But a quiet walk in the fresh air will benefit the child.

Before going to bed, you should not scold your baby for any offenses or unwillingness to sleep. Even if the baby manages to fall asleep, his sleep will be superficial and restless.

Correcting the situation

So, what to do if your child does not sleep during the day? Correct all the shortcomings that I mentioned above. In particular:

1. Feed your baby on demand. Firstly, it is very relaxing and calming, and secondly, it helps to establish lactation (the first two months are just the period of its establishment. Read the article on this topic: Successful start of breastfeeding >>>);
2. Provide your baby with conditions similar to those in the womb:

• create darkness;
• remove extraneous noise;
• to eliminate the risk of the baby waking up from a sharp sound, turn on monotonous white noise (read the article: White noise for a newborn >>>);
• warmth and tightness perfectly imitate swaddling and rocking a baby under the mother's breast. You can carry your baby in a sling to ensure constant body contact, rock him on a fitball, or go outside for a nap in a stroller.

Know!

Don’t be afraid that your child will get used to these methods and will not be able to fall asleep on their own in the future. Children do not develop habits until 3 months of age.

1. Create a calm and friendly atmosphere in the family. Negative emotions and frequent screaming do not contribute to normal sleep, either day or night;
2. Give your child enough attention during waking hours so that he does not develop emotional deficits;
3. Ask your family to help you with household chores so that you have time not only for troubles with the baby, but also for yourself: for relaxation, beauty treatments, adequate rest;
4. Monitor your baby's waking hours and signs of fatigue. At this age, children get tired very quickly and if they are allowed to “overnight” (for more than an hour), their nervous system gets excited, preventing them from sleeping normally.

“Telling” signs may be an increase in the search reflex, constant clenching of fists, thumb sucking, dissatisfied “faces,” sudden throwing up of arms and legs.

Now you know what to do if your baby is 2 months old and does not sleep during the day.

Maybe you can easily find the reason that is preventing your child from sleeping, or maybe the situation is a little more complicated.

In this case, watch the online seminar on infant sleep to get a clear system for establishing a child’s sleep at this age: Restful sleep for a baby from 0 to 6 months >>>

A child’s proper overall development depends on adequate sleep.

This is very important in the first year of life. And in the first months - especially

What difficulties have you encountered with your child's sleep?

Lyudmila Sharova, consultant on breastfeeding and children's sleep.

The baby, born two months ago, is not yet able to control sleep. Therefore, parents are advised to monitor the child’s well-being, feed and put them to bed on time. If there is no control, not only daytime but also nighttime rest may be disrupted. After all, a baby’s biological rhythms are not tuned.

The daily routine of a two-month-old baby is completely independent of the parents. Basically, the child sleeps and stays awake based on physiological needs. He spends 70% of the day resting; the rest of the time he explores the world around him and eats.

At night, the child sleeps 10-12 hours, waking up 4-5 times. If your baby is breastfed, the number of night feedings may increase. Daytime sleep lasts 40-120 minutes, 3-4 times. Early awakening or lack of sleep can affect this “schedule”.

If the mother pays attention to the approximate time of sleep and wakefulness, then by two months of the baby’s life it is already possible to create a daily routine. It changes and gets lost without harm to the baby

At this age, the regime is needed solely for the convenience of parents.

Why does a baby sleep poorly at 2 months? The duration and number of rest periods are influenced by a number of factors:

• health status;
• the presence of external stimuli (noise, light);
• behavioral characteristics, the developing character of the baby.

A young mother needs to take into account that the child is emotionally very attached to her, especially the first few months after birth. Therefore, you can notice causeless tearfulness and irritability of the baby. In this case, spend more time with him, walk, talk, try to nap together.

How to cope with whims

Advice from psychologists

If, at a moment of hysteria or stubbornness, you enter into an argument with your child and begin to prove your point of view, the situation will only worsen. If possible, the baby should be reassured, and during a period of serenity, explain that it is impossible to behave this way, giving arguments. You need to talk to the child, teach him to listen to your opinion, make him want to follow your instructions. Dr. Komarovsky claims that at the moment of a child’s hysteria, parents should be calm as a boa constrictor, firstly, this way you will let the child understand that he will not be able to manipulate you, and secondly, you will prevent new outbursts of emotions, thereby significantly reducing the duration of the unpleasant event . Thirdly, children tend to unconsciously adopt the behavior and emotions of adults; in other words, with your emotional balance you send a message of calm.

In the period from two to five years, children are especially emotional, so parents must learn to sense the slightest changes in the child’s mood. At the slightest hint of a change in mood in a bad direction, you should distract the baby and switch his attention to something else. If a little stubborn person insists on his own, calmly and confidently explain the possible consequences of his wrong action, and it is not recommended to intimidate children with fictitious malicious characters and other crap of this kind. All explanatory conversations must have logic and sound explanation.

Do not use physical violence under any circumstances, do not raise your voice, or call your child names, especially in the presence of strangers. This way you will only humiliate him, reduce trust between you to a minimum, and possibly create complexes.

Often children simply do not know what to do with themselves and, due to an excess of energy, begin to play tricks. Coping with this problem is quite simple - direct the energy in the right direction - offer to take a walk, draw, play with the baby, in a word, come up with an interesting activity.

Correct parental behavior is the standard for the child to strive for.

How to help a child who is crying

The whims of a little man sometimes stun the most persistent and calm parents. To avoid prolonged outbursts of emotions as much as possible, teach your child to have friendly conversations, never make fun of his naive questions, satisfy his curiosity, because he is just learning about the world around him. An incorrect reaction to healthy childhood curiosity can lead to serious psychological problems, which will come back to haunt you later. The child may become withdrawn, he will develop a fear of being ridiculed, a feeling of shame for not knowing or not understanding something. Naturally, the negative experience gained in learning and the complexes that arise will imperceptibly transfer to school. Contain your emotions, treat your child with love, understanding and respect, develop in him an understanding of good and bad, respectful attitude towards elders, useful habits, neatness and taste through conversations, a friendly attitude, understanding and readiness to support at any moment.

Teach your child to apologize, but only after he realizes his wrongdoing and, most importantly, say goodbye! In moments of success in play or learning, do not forget to praise children, motivating them to new feats. You need to praise the baby for something specific, for example, “Thank you for helping,” “Drawed a beautiful oval, good girl!”, “I finished the soup, well done!” Another secret to effective praise is the use of the pronouns “I” and “Me” - “I am very grateful to you for the birthday gift, the drawing is very beautiful, smart girl.” When praising, not only the spoken text is important, but also attention, your genuine joy, physical contact, and timeliness.

How to behave as parents

If the reason for your child's tears lies in grief, do the following:

1. At the moment of rebellion, that is, at the peak of the child’s emotional outburst, look the baby in the eyes and with a smile, quietly and calmly say what is needed, explaining his feelings. For example, “You want to play with your friends some more, but we need to go home for lunch now.” This way you let your child know that you cannot stay on the playground at the moment, but you know that he is upset and understand him. Explain that you can come to the playground tomorrow, and this going home does not lead to the end of the world, so the child will learn to perceive the loss adequately.
2. When the hurricane of emotions has subsided, open your tender arms to the little man and give him the opportunity to cry or be sad in peace.
3. After the child becomes sad, the stage of accepting the loss begins, the baby calms down and understands that nothing terrible, in essence, happened. As a rule, at this moment an exhalation is heard, the baby releases the parent from the hug and changes the topic of conversation.

In fact, coping with crying and children's tantrums is not so difficult, the only exceptions are health problems and an unhealthy atmosphere in the family. First you need to understand why exactly the child is crying, then act wisely. The latter depends solely on adults; it is not recommended to show problems to children, make a scandal in front of them, sort things out, etc. Whatever the situation in the family, protect your offspring as much as possible from any manifestation of negativity or demonstration of your emotions. The most important thing is to love and feel your child, to study behavior, tricks, facial expressions and gestures characteristic of specific emotions. It is important to respond in a timely manner to mood swings, control your own behavior, stand firmly on your own, without succumbing to the child’s cunning tricks and not use violence. At the slightest suspicion of health problems, consult a doctor as soon as possible, and if necessary, visit a family psychologist. In a word, the physical and mental health of the baby is in your hands!

Why does my child sleep poorly?

What can prevent the baby from sleeping peacefully at this time and giving the mother the opportunity to fully rest for his own good?
“Children’s” problems: your baby turned out to be a “night owl”, which means that it will be late for him to go to bed. You will try in vain to force him to lie down; he, reacting to your irritation and despair, will scream until he wants to sleep.

Unfortunately, the child’s biological rhythm does not depend on parental attitudes. And the healthy habit of getting up early only works in some cases, regardless of the age of those tested. That is, you can get used to getting up at 6 am and starting to work, but scientists testify: physiological processes in the body remain inhibited until the “natural” time of awakening.

Isn't this combination of interests of all family members similar to the daily routine so disliked by modern mothers? Alas, psychologists testify that the first generation of those whom their parents freed from the regime at one time, giving seemingly unconditional love and protection from stress, approached their 20s with a number of behavioral and psychological problems. Life has again confirmed the obvious postulate: it is good in moderation and in place.

“Adult” problems: colic, gas, teething, baby illness, confused day and night - here insomnia is understandable, and the need for help is obvious. But after six months these problems are solved. And after each of these disruptions, family life returns to normal again, taking into account the interests of all its members.

If other dysregulation (changes in muscle tone, increased excitability) is added to sleep disturbances in a child of the first year of life, it is worth consulting a neurologist. In such cases, a diagnosis of “perinatal damage to the nervous system” is sometimes made and appropriate treatment is selected.

But in this case, the doctor will answer the parents’ questions. How to respond to sleep disturbances if the baby is healthy?

Sleeping room

Try to provide your child with a personal room, if your capabilities allow you to do so. The environment in the nursery should create a cozy and calming atmosphere:

• Provide good sound insulation in the nursery so that nothing disturbs the baby's sleep.
• Maintain an optimal microclimate in the room - Dr. Komarovsky recommends for children a temperature of 18 - 20 ° C and a humidity of about 50 - 70%.
• Regularly ventilate the room and do wet cleaning.
• Use bedding only from natural fabrics. It should always be fresh and clean, calm colors in light colors. You can also use bedding with your baby's favorite characters.
• Take care of the safety of the sleeping place, check for any sharp protrusions.
• Using a radio or video nanny will allow you to promptly learn about your baby's restless sleep if he has his own room.
• A special night light or a favorite toy taken with you to bed will protect you from monsters and drive away fears.

Clinical and perinatal psychologist, graduated from the Moscow Institute of Perinatal Psychology and Reproductive Psychology and Volgograd State Medical University with a degree in clinical psychology More details »

First age crisis

At the age of 4, children experience their first age crisis, which is characterized by the following changes in behavior:

• whims;
• protests;
• increased sensitivity;
• stubbornness;
• irritation.

The baby may react to comments or the psychological situation with increased tearfulness, nervous breakdowns or disobedience. Interestingly, internal protest or non-compliance with requests is not expressed verbally. Children at this age are unable to clearly define their internal state in words and show it in this way.

Internal discomfort and tension lead to the development of disappointment, anxiety or despair. High sensitivity and a feeling of deprivation (of attention, toys, etc.) cause sleep disturbances.

"I myself"

Children's activity levels increase rapidly at the age of 4 years. In addition, they develop an awareness of themselves as individuals, and often such self-esteem is inflated. Children aged 3-5 years are very responsive, love to do “adult” things, copy the behavior of adults, thereby internally identifying themselves as one of them.

During this period, it is very important for parents to have an adequate attitude towards their child, since a careless remark like “your hands are full of holes” can seriously and deeply hurt him. Phrases like: “I’d rather do it myself”, lack of emotional contact with the baby, can lead to sleep disturbances, autism and alienation

How to raise a brave child?

In order for a child to grow up courageous and active, it is necessary to make certain efforts, and the following recommendations can help in achieving this:

• do not humiliate, but also do not make the child and his desires the main thing;
• treat him as an equal, respect his personality;
• do not scare the baby or punish him without serious reasons;
• make sure that he has enough communication with different people - relatives, peers, friends;
• make various crafts with your child, engage in creativity with him - this way you can monitor his mental state and neutralize fears that appear in time;
• Hug and kiss your baby more often - physical contact with your parents will help him feel your care and protection;
• monitor the atmosphere in the family - trust, respect and love will help reduce, or even completely get rid of fears.

How does a baby sleep?

Babies' sleep patterns are different from those of adults. In infancy, it differs in its order and duration. This is due to the fact that the baby’s organs and systems at this age still function imperfectly, especially the brain.

From the first minutes after the birth of a baby, painstaking work takes place in his head to adapt to the world around him. When he sleeps, these processes continue. Conventionally, there are two phases in sleep: active and calm (the difference between the sleep of a child and an adult is the duration of these phases).

If you attach sensors to a person’s head during sleep and conduct an electroencephalogram, you can see that slow-wave oscillations are replaced by fast ones over time. After a certain period of time they become slow again.

Based on this information, scientists have identified two phases of it.

Fast (paradoxical), it is also called the REM period, which literally translates as “active eye movement.” It can manifest itself in the following ways: active eye movement, twitching of eyelashes, increased breathing, increased heart rate, and complete immobility of the body.

This phase is especially important in the newborn age. Since during this period, brain development is stimulated, nervous and psycho-emotional tension is relieved, new information is processed, the endocrine and emotional systems are “rebooted,” training and development of the brain occurs.

Slow (orthodox) or its second name is non-REM, that is, “without active eye movement.” During this period, there is a slow rotation of the eyeballs and a slowdown in all body functions.

In infants, this phase has two stages, and starting from the age of four months - four (drowsing, falling asleep, deep sleep, very deep sleep). It is very necessary for babies, as it promotes full formation and normal physical development. During this period, the child’s strength is restored, expended energy is renewed, and the body is overloaded.

The duration of the slow stage in children is not long, no more than 30 minutes, but with the stages of growing up its duration increases because the baby gets more tired.

If the baby wakes up during deep sleep, he may be capricious and cry because he did not get enough sleep (the neurochemical processes that take place during this stage have not been completed).

The phases of this process by three to four months of age are approaching those of an adult, with the exception of the duration of its cycles. One circle includes four slow sleep phases and one REM sleep. In infancy, its duration is on average 30–45 minutes, at the age of five years it is about an hour, and at ten–twelve years it becomes like that of an adult.

Restless sleep up to six months

The quality and duration of children’s rest directly depends on the maturation of their nervous system. For example, for newborns whose brains are actively developing, shallow sleep predominates. Compared to deep, it takes up 80%.

Every day this ratio will change in favor of sound sleep and by 3 years the REM (superficial) stage will be only 30%. Thus, frequent waking up is not at all a problem for an infant, but a physiological feature necessary for the development of the nervous system.

A more significant factor is sleep duration. Exact norms in numbers can be found in the article “How much time do newborns spend sleeping.” Parents of infants should worry if their baby sleeps less than 14 hours per day. In addition to neurological problems, this occurs for the following reasons:

• is he hot or cold;
• the baby is hungry - this is especially true for infants, since “artificial babies” eat less often;
• colic begins;
• nasal breathing is impaired.

Newborns often awaken themselves with spontaneous movements of their arms and legs. Therefore, if your one-month-old baby sleeps restlessly, try swaddling him.

Causes of poor sleep

Around the age of two, the child switches to one nap during the day and sleeps peacefully throughout the night, without waking up for snacks. But sometimes there are interruptions in sleep, be it night or daytime sleep.

It is often much easier to understand the cause and eliminate it at this age, because the baby himself can tell or show what hurts or bothers him. If a child at this age continues to sleep poorly, takes a long time to fall asleep, or is capricious in the middle of the night, this indicates more serious problems that require medical diagnosis and treatment.

Also, a child may have trouble falling asleep and having poor sleep for the following reasons:

• Heredity. Often the cause of poor sleep in two-year-old children is hereditary diseases, which only an experienced specialist in this field can help cope with.
• Stress, fear, and emotional fatigue can also cause a child to have trouble falling asleep. Try not to subject your child to such tests and not to over-walk him, playing active games before bedtime.
• A failure in the baby's routine is often accompanied by a long time to fall asleep and poor sleep for the baby.
• The cause may also be a feeling of hunger, cold, heat or other physical factors.
• Weaning (many women can feed their children up to 4 years old) is stressful for the baby, which is accompanied by poor sleep.
• Late hearty dinner. Many adults know for themselves that it is difficult to fall asleep soundly on a full stomach. And children react to such changes even more strongly than adults.
• Bruxism is a syndrome in which a child clenches his teeth tightly, starting to grind them violently, and his heartbeat and breathing rhythms change. Many are inclined to the theory that worms may be the cause of this. But modern medicine has proven that, most likely, the consequence of such behavior in sleep is disorders in the nervous system, when the facial muscles cannot relax even during sleep.
• Respiratory arrest, which may be associated with ENT diseases (adenoids, colds, runny nose, tonsils). Also, the cause of breathing problems may be the child's excess weight.
• Change of usual environment. Often, when visiting, a two-year-old child feels a change in his usual environment, especially if his mother is not around, and reacts to this not only by poor sleep, but also by refusal to eat, hysteria, and withdrawal. If such phenomena are observed every time you go on an overnight visit, give up such experiments on the child’s psyche, because each such stress weakens the baby’s still unstable nervous system.

Night terrors in children

The first two nights my son had night terrors (before I found out what they were) were the worst nights of my life. Night terrors are different from nightmares and occur only in a small percentage of children. Usually, fear manifests itself in the early phase of a child’s sleep and on those nights when something has disrupted his usual schedule (he went on vacation, someone came to visit from another city). Although children's night terrors are not easy for parents to cope with, they do not pose any particular danger to the child.

At first, you may think your child is having a nightmare. But the difference is that the child is not awake, but asleep. He sleeps very soundly and cannot wake up, although his eyes will be wide open. He may cry, he may call you, but even if you are nearby, he does not understand this and may shout at you and drive you away.

In the morning, the child will not even remember this incident (because he was sleeping). I advise you not to question your child or tell anything about it. Usually, after the child has made noise and cried, he sleeps peacefully again, as if nothing had happened.

Night terrors can last about five minutes or half an hour. The most important thing in this situation is to ensure the child’s safety so that he does not get hurt. Some children will allow you to hold them, others will push you away and become even more violent if you touch them. It is best to wait out this moment and calm down yourself.

When a baby has trouble falling asleep

If the baby is breastfed, a close connection with his mother is extremely important for him. And emotional and psychological as well. When the mother is calm and balanced, the child will also be calm. If she is in a bad mood or overexcited, this is passed on to the baby. And in this state he definitely has no time for sleep. So, in order for the child to fall asleep quickly and soundly, parents need to work on their emotional mood.

In addition, it is necessary to monitor the organization of the baby’s free time. When he is awake, it is advisable to keep him busy with some activity. You should also not forget about physical activity. Select them according to the age of the baby. This could be regular exercise or swimming in the bathroom. However, all this should be done only during the day. Toward evening, you should not overload your baby with impressions and activities. Physically, he will want rest, but the overload of the nervous system will not allow him to fall asleep quickly.

Go out with your baby for a walk in the fresh air more often. Walking has a positive effect on the child’s psyche, helps the baby develop harmoniously and significantly improves the quality of sleep.

If a child has difficulty falling asleep due to colic that torments him, the mother urgently needs to adjust her diet and eliminate foods that increase gas formation. And give the baby the drug prescribed by the pediatrician. When your baby can't sleep because of teething, you can try to reduce the discomfort by massaging the gums or using a special pain-relieving gel.

It’s very good to create your own falling asleep ritual. For example, putting your baby to bed after taking a cool bath. If there are no allergic reactions, you can add 3-4 drops of lavender essential oil to the bath. It is characterized by a calming effect.

As already mentioned, the conditions in which children go to bed are also important. Loud sounds, bright lights and other irritants should be avoided. The room should be ventilated and sufficiently humidified.

Daily regime

An important role in a child’s healthy sleep is played by his daily routine. If a child (2 years old) sleeps poorly at night, there is a disturbed daily routine. It is necessary to accustom your child to the family schedule from birth. You need to prepare for bed in advance. The time at which the child should go to bed should be constant. At the same time, it should be comfortable not only for the child himself, but also suit the parents so that there are no disagreements.

A child's day should be filled with positive events. Of course, it is not at all necessary to organize entertainment shows for him all day every day. It is quite enough to take an active walk, play active and educational games. If possible, place your child in the fresh air for naps. In the evening, it is necessary to limit emotional and physical stress by offering the child calm games such as modeling or coloring.